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October 14, 2022

2 Minion Poems

Julián Martinez

Real Cinema


Do the Minions explore each others’ bodies?

Do they tape it with Illumination studio cameras?

Do the animators frown upon them from heaven?

Does a Minion have an inner lip tattoo that

reads, “only my animators can judge me”?


Would a Minion ever tear a photo of Walt Disney

in half mid-movie and say, “fight the real enemy”?

Who’s the first Minion to kill a fellow Minion?


I want a movie about the first Minion insurrection.

How much regret they held onto

for the rest of their lives

would be left for after, to our franchised imaginations.




The Supposed Song of The Summer


We finally listened to “Rich Minion,” 

and what a crown jewel of a song for that July

evening – last day off of work, alarms set for 6 am –


I’d never felt the lack of A/C in my room until

that day, not ‘cause of Yeat, but how long we’d laid


pressing our armpits close, in protest of time

and how untenderly it would treat us, while

an Auto-Tuned voice groaned on about the money


left to sweat and touch and do you remember

his Channel 5 interview? Andrew asks Yeat

what he wants to be when he’s an old man –


he replies “nothing,” says that he’s in love,

but I can’t recall what with – you yanked

an ingrown hair out of the small of my back


and held it up to my newly-awakened eye

like a smash hit we’d be loaded off for life.