- First, open your package of Horse Parts from Glue Factory Unlimited™.
- Next, using your Glue Factory Unlimited's Perfect Factory Glue™ and your provided ruler, begin to put together your horse. Follow steps A through G. We recommend you begin with the head instead of the tail.
- Once your Horse is complete, please keep your Horse in a deep freezer or meat locker. Somewhere cold enough to die. Allow your Horse to die. Freeze to death. Turn to frost.
- Take your Horse out of the freezer and into the heat. Warm your Horse. Return it to normal warmth.
- Using your Glue Factory Unlimited's Perfect Factory Horse Tranquilizer Serum™ and your Glue Factory Unlimited's Perfect Factory Syringe™, inject directly into the neck of your Horse. Watch how wild your Horse leaps!
- Let it begin its life this way. From pieces in a deep freezer to now. If you allow it, your Horse will see you as its God. It will do as it is told.
- Name your Horse Joel or Skull or Tony or Tone but do not name your Horse Colt. Do not name it this name. Do not.
- If your Horse refuses to leap or only merely crawls, we're sorry, we're so sorry. If your Horse does nothing at all, call us. Please. Give us a call. We're always awake.
